A recent development in the past year or so at our dojo has been an "internal shinsa" to test for whether or not the dojo leadership would allow us to challenge for the next shinsa. I love the idea.
My own feedback? I wish I had done worse. I have a problem. I don't like positive feedback. It doesn't tell me much. By no means was the performance perfect, and there were critiques. They were simply stifled by the positives. It deflates the sense of urgency and need for me.
I suppose that there is an up side. It forces me to be the negative one. We didn't get to see the recordings, so I can only focus on what I was told and what I normally don't do well. And that too is a blessing in disguise. That performance was singular. Both in the literal sense and in the sense that I was feeling REALLY GOOD that day. I've never been able to perform so "freely". So, in some sense, focusing too much on that performance might not be as helpful.
The critiques I did get are that my draw isn't even, my hanare isn't always balanced and I need to turn my hand more at daisan so my index finger is pointing at the target.
Things I know I need to work on in general, even if I did well on them that day? Mezukai, maintaining dozukuri, moving with the hips, moving with "life" and maintaining harmony with others.
I was "lucky" during the shinsa with regards to harmony. I was omae. I set the pace. There are still considerations like maintaining a consistent pace and not progressing too aggressively in some movements where people need to remain in sync. But being omae takes a lot of the burden around timing. I usually do worse in that respect in other positions.
Mezukai is a recent focus in the dojo. I have a lot of bad habits to untrain and new ones to develop. I think this is one that just needs practice. Thankfully, some of this practice can come at home.
Maintaining dozukuri is an inherent weakness of mine. I have bad posture to begin with. Needing to maintain a straighter posture with the ensou shape is very easy to fall out of. I suspect this will be a very long term effort for me. While I can practice this at home it is a bit less practical.
Moving with the hips and moving with the body animated with life are somewhat intertwined. At least for the walking parts. I'm slowly getting more used to letting the hips lead the movements. And when walking this way, these is a natural ebb and flow to the resistance which gives the desired effect almost for free. Though I still need to work on applying it in other movements, especially "big" movements yudaoshi or hirakiashi where it is incredibly obvious when you're not doing it.
The criticism from the shinsa itself is stuff I've been working on for a while. Part of it was my new bow causing me to revert to not trusting my equipment. I need to finish getting over this to return to my prior form. I also need to work up more strength. I think that the uneven draw is partially a result of fatigue/weakness. I underestimated the jump to 14kg.
Needless to say, any chance to "test" and be evaluated is useful. I don't really care about the outcome of the test as much as the feedback.
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